Chapter 3

Chapter 3 Draft (07/01/08)

The trip from New Texas through Pecos Station and out to Truscott was as boring as anything in Andy Webb’s memory. The only saving grace to this whole trip as Muriel had artfully pointed out, was a month away from the kids. So after two weeks of unwinding and remembering they really were married, the upcoming job made them finally begin the mind shift that this trip was going to require.

“So where did you say we were going to get the guns?” Asked Muriel while discussing other plans.

“In a safe at the Webb offices, Great-Grandpa had them smuggled out there about 80 years ago.” Andy answered with that damn infectious grin, “Have you ever met a Webb who was not a little paranoid?”

“I am certain that it is in some yet undetermined portion of the DNA chain for your family,” Muriel replied drolly with an answering grin. “What about FG eavesdropping, how are we going to get around that?”

“Oh, I had a dozen or so jammer’s shipped out there before I gave Walt Davis his. No need that I could think of to let him know we had already been working on them.”

“I repeat, paranoid just has to be in the Webb DNA,” Muriel said while ruefully shaking her head.

Ten days later Muriel and Ric Saunders the Webb Planetary Manager were seated in the Truscott offices of Webb Enterprises watching Andy open a safe that Ric did not even have the combination for. Andy pulled out the case opened it and he and Muriel began to load the magazines of the four small concealable pistols contained therein.

“Think you are really gonna have to go that far Boss?” Ric asked in a worried tone.

“Actually Ric, I hope not; I am really hoping that it’s just a mis-understanding. But, with Paul dumping all those chips on Earth it put us in a possible security bind. We can’t afford to have any suspicions pointed at us right now.”

“Something big coming Boss?”

“Not that I can tell you about right yet Ric.”

“Well, I had kinda hope that you had hired my ass as an Intel Puke, who can shoot more than for that MBA.”

Andy looked at Muriel with a wry knowing grin, “Have you ever noticed how the Intel Puke always asks the same question just worded a little differently?”

“You wound me Boss! Besides if I ever loose the habit I would not be worth much on the business side now would I?”

“Ric, if I need a dirty business deal or Industrial Espionage done you are the first place I turn but, this is really to big to let you in just right now!”

“Then I have a sneaking suspicion as to what it is Boss.”

“Yeah, well keep it to yourself and set up those appointments for me while Muriel
and I go do some shopping. Sooner or later we will pick up a tail and we can send the message to Paul.”

They were in their fourth Boot and Leather store. Everyone had heard Muriel explaining to an obviously impatient husband that she was going to find a good set of riding boots. Not only that she said, that place would get the order for the new chaps for the triplets. So hardly anyone would have noticed the subtle signal a seemingly bored to death Andy gave to Muriel.

Leaving that store they began what Muriel announced was a three block walk to a store that Kathy Saunders had recommended and fended off Andy’s loud question of “Why didn’t we go there first?” to the laughter of every female shopper in sight.

About a block and a half down the street their obvious tail lost sight of them in a crowd that conveniently was 75% Webb employees sent there by Ric Saunders.

The smaller of the two suddenly felt himself jerked against the wall of an alley with an arm bar against his throat and a knife at his crotch.

“If you want to keep those very small dangling soft parts you men are so proud of, stay still and quiet while my husband delivers a message to your partner. When we get through, go tell your Mossad derived trainer that you need more instruction.”

As he looked at the angelically soft face with the “Butter would not melt in my mouth” look, he also saw the eyes. They were the cold dark pits of someone who not only could kill but had done so. He decided to stay real quiet.

In the alley on the other side of the store, the larger of the two found himself in an iron hard arm lock, face against the wall, and with his shoulder crying in agony.

“Be still or I rip it off and feed it to you. Now get the word to Paul, Gaithers Steakhouse tomorrow night at 8:00 PM. When he approaches tell him to ask loudly about the kids.

“Then go tell whoever is your Intel Puke, the next tail he puts on me he better be ready to lose.”

As he was released he turned and saw the just under two meter monster with the dead cold eyes, “Sure whatever you say.”

Andy’s face relaxed just a bit, “No problem kid, just get the messages delivered, it’s not your fault they sent you after the A-Team.”

* * *
Paul Green approached Gaithers Steakhouse with great trepidation. He knew Andrew Webb as a businessman and Communications Engineer of great repute. The reports from his Intelligence people painted a much different picture. From their reports He was going to face a coiled snake.
Entering the restaurant he saw the Webb’s instantly, that booth cost a bunch to obtain. That part at least fit, sucking it up he approached as informed. “Well what the heck, how’s it going Andy and how are the kids? What brings you out this way?”

“Dang business, what else? We were just looking at some pictures of the kids, drag up a chair and have dinner. Hell, it’s on me; never turn down free food and booze!”

“I for sure never would do that,” Paul said as he pulled out the spare chair at the table. As he sat he saw Muriel Webb press a button on a small device and he was stunned. His radio link, tracker and even his implant recorder died in a flash. Nothing worked in the zone of that small device that Andrew Webb did not allow. For the first time Paul felt some unease, he had always assumed that if he had to, he could take the big soft bastard. He had even discounted young Avram’s description of Muriel and her knife; now he was looking into those eyes for himself. He was going to have to apologize to Avram.

“Don’t worry about what you say here Paul, it goes only as far as us.”
Paul flinched visibly, “Who or what are you really?”

“First, we are an Eraser Team; Second we are the money behind something I think you really want to be a part of; Third, we are your worst fucking nightmare if you cannot explain this file.”

Paul looked at the PDA he was handed and after a moment blanched, who the hell could do this kind of back-end analysis. It was solid gold and he could see why Webb was pissed but, He had no idea who could have pulled this together.

“Well, you told me to do with the extra chips what I thought best to help my friends. New Masada needed credits. We took what we got and built two Hospitals and three Clinics. Hell we even bought most of the stuff from your companies.

“We had people dying and we needed credits to save them, the black market on Earth was the fastest way to go.”

The Ice Cold eyes of Muriel Webb softened as she spoke to Andy, “He’s telling the truth, Dear God his soul is crying out. He’s ready to die to defend what they did.”

Paul sat stunned as the two stared at each other and slowly they made a strange motion with their wrists; he with his right, her with her left. Somehow in a manner he did not understand, he knew that the threat was off. He was going to walk out of here.

“Paul,” Andy asked, “can you play as part of a Team and do what you are told even when you don’t understand why?”

“I guess me and my people could if we knew what the end game was supposed to be.”

“Fair enough, let’s see how your knowledge of History holds up. What does Yorktown mean to you?”

His reply came faster than Andy expected, “We are free you Bastards!”

“That Paul is what I am asking you and your people to sign onto. We need you skills at smuggling and hiding things but, you will need to work with us to prevent stuff like that file I showed you.

“We are going to start with an Asteroid Extraction Operation around New Masada followed by a full fledged Orbital Shipyard. The economy out there is going to get a big kick. Point of fact, that is going to be our excuse to the FG. That place is going to be our cover, we need your outfit to cover the other shall we say ‘Hinky Shit’ that’s going to have to happen.”

“I think I can convince my normal money grubbers. What can I use to sell the general populace out there?”

“Simply this. We will require them to produce at least eight crews for the Assault Shuttles that my brother is going to build. When we go to Earth, this will be their Target List, feel free to copy it but consider it ‘Die Before Exposure’, I think they might come around.”

Paul Green stared at the target list from Heaven for his people. There was no way he could keep the people of New Masada away from this dream. He merely looked Webb in the eyes, “You mean this don’t you?”

“If your people don’t do it mine will but, we think you deserve the shot!”

“Zahal Colonel, we are in!”

“Good, we will start the overt programs as soon as we get back to New Texas. Start getting you people in line for the covert stuff. That will get passed to you by Ric Saunders over one of these, thumb print here please.”

Paul was looking at the most expensive communicator he had ever seen.

“Line three is secure as all get out, the contacts tab will let you see everyone on the circuit who is in range. Just don’t let anyone else try to use channel three, they will loose their hands at least!”

“Dear God, you don’t work in half measures do you. This is rolling already isn’t it?”

“Yes, even with the fast start we are trying to get rolling; it’s going to take at least twenty years. So have yourself a good meal and relax. We have to go brief Ric when we finish here.”

“One question Andy, would you really have shot me?”

“Oh Hell No, knives don’t need silencers!”

* * *
Kirsten Winters heard the sound of a large flitter coming in and shrugged. It was that time of year when all of the home schooled children had to show up to take the mandated FG competency test. For almost all of the children of New Texas this was a useless formality, their parents would not allow them to be dumbed down to the FG norms.

Which suited Kirsten just fine both as an educator and a writer of teaching software. She had in fact been essentially exiled to New Texas for protesting shoddy teaching. Her side job of writing for Edu-Systems Software was in fact a handsome income on its own. They of course demanded no dumbing down what so ever. In specific they demanded that History especially Military History be taught with unflinching rigor. In her discussions with another writer she had found that they were equally demanding with regards to Physics and Mathematics.

oing to the front door she was mildly surprised to see Linda Webb unloading the Webb triplets. Linda was not dressed like her normal elegant self, instead she was decked out in jeans, boots, western style shirt and a floppy brimmed old western style hat. It seemed that she must be staying out at Andy and Muriel’s place playing grandmother. “Good afternoon Mrs. Webb, I have to admit I was expecting Muriel.”

The returned smile was defiantly high wattage and not her political special, “Kirsten, it’s Linda and Muriel went off on that little trip to Truscott with Andy so I am playing full time grandma.

“Although I am sure the fun will wear off long before they get back, it is a pleasant change of pace from politics and business. I have never really had time to spoil this brood as all good grandmothers should do, but I should have them nicely ripe by the time their parents get back.”

Kirsten was taken slightly aback, this was not the cold formal woman she knew of, it was as if something had been lifted from her shoulders and something long hidden had been allowed to escape. They got the kids into the testing room and as usual these three lost the young cheerful faces and became set in the here is a challenge mode. What challenge Kirsten thought, here were three children working on a daily basis in the low to middle High School range being asked to take a fourth grade test. The challenge was how fast can we beat this idiocy into submission and start summer break.

As they went back into the main house as the kids attacked the testing program, Linda suddenly became serious once again. “Bringing the kids by for their testing let me make a delivery for Andrew. Here is your new secure comm unit, as you can see it looks like a normal three channel unit. Channel three now puts you on the new secure network and as you will see keeps a constantly updated contact list. You will always see everyone on the network who is range for comms. Please press your thumb print right here.”

As Kirsten complied, Linda touched a few keys with lightning like moves then she seemed to relax again. “Let me warn you that if someone without that print attempts to use channel three they will be missing one or both hands when the noise is over.”

“Good grief, how can Andy or you afford to just give out something like this? I mean the thought of handling this thing scares me but so does the price and the secrecy.”

“Kirsten have you ever read a wonderfully funny series of books called ‘The Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy’?”

“Why yes, Douglas Adams wrote some wonderfully satirical political humor on a vaguely Science Fantasy base.”

“Rest assured Kirsten, that the books at Webb Enterprises bear the same resemblance to reality as did the numbers on the Waiters check in the Improbability Drive. Not only that but our bright shiny eyed CPAs at great-granddads accounting firm have been doing Davis Mining’s book for 60 years. Money is not the problem and anyone Andy trusts with this stuff somehow has demonstrated something to him.

“At last this has started and my sons have promised to do thing one thing I most want in the Universe. Bring me Richard Redmond’s head. Then I will finally have vengeance for a husband and the man I called Father.”

Kirsten could only stare, Walt Davis had been correct. The real hate at Webb exuded from this supremely poised woman and her confidence in her sons.

* * *
Walt Davis brought his flitter in low over Gates Field and saw that Chris Webb was already here. The tricked out flitter that was his personal ride was familiar all over New Texas. How he got away with his tweaking was best expressed by their California derived FG Inspector, “Rednecks and their race cars, what do you expect?” It was fairly well known that as long as Chris kept his pushing of the envelope to Atmospheric, that Bob Carver (equally a performance freak) was not going to report any violation.

Walt wondered why it was so urgent that he come out to Gates Field on this day, he guessed he would find out sooner than later. It wasn’t like the world was not changing around him, what the hell had he started?

Walt was greeted by the bikini clad Caitrin Gates obviously on her way to a dive. “Warrick and the guys are up in the den, beer is cold on the right on your way in. I have a date at 5000 feet, y’all have fun.”

Walt went up the sloping ramp to the house and into the hallway to the den. As promised there was the cooler full of a New Texas revival, Lone Star beer in long neck bottles. Funny though the new Lone Star tasted more like the legendary Shiner Bock than anything else. Anticipating the worst Walt grabbed two and entered the den. As he had half expected and feared the giant flat display was filled with plans for an unusual looking cargo vessel.

“Hi Walt, drag up a chair and watch the show. This is the cargo vessel we want to build. As you can see we are using a 95 MW super conductor ring just as the FG will allow and here we have two very secure rooms for high value cargo and an automated rail loading system. This is going to allow us to fly with four man crews as opposed to the 15 man crews of the FG companies. That ought to help our profit margin.”

“Ok, that sounds good Chris, but why those four big grooves in the back of the cargo area?”

“Why Walt, that’s for structure bracing in conjunction with weight savings,” Chris said with a smile that would not melt butter. “Our only problem is getting Danmar Construction to build these exactly to our specs.”

Walt grimaced, “They are owned by a holding company called DEW Holdings. Those are the people you have to convince.”

Chris just stared, “And DEW was who?”

Walt shook his head, “OK, your Grandpa, my Grandpa and Jeff Edwards Grandpa but Jeff ain’t in on this!”

“Says the Hell who?” Came the jovial booming voice of Jeff Edwards, the young giant of a rock miner who was the boss of Edwards Asteroid Mining. “Just because you did not see fit to have me at you little soirée does not mean I just might agree with you!”

Chris watched the two men stare each other down. He had only heard the stories of how these two childhood friends had grown apart as their companies competed for the same markets. Walt thankfully was the first to blink.

“Yeah that was my bad Jeff, I let business get in the way of logic; even of old friendship.” Walt turned his glance around the room, “Is there anyone else I left out by being stupid stubborn?”

“Nope,” three voices chimed as one. “That about covers it.”

“Anyway Walt, you need to see what we will be able to convert these babies to.” Chris offered in a hopeful voice, “These are going to be MY babies,” and the screen transformed. Extra bulkheads appeared in red, the loading hatches became missile launchers and gun emplacements. Much more scary was that the secure rooms were now labeled Fusion One and Fusion Two; the four grooves were filled with two huge super conductor rings and the exciter coils of a Reactionless Drive. Two long tubes appeared in the belly space and pointed forward towards the gap in the RD field, Walt had no idea what those were.

Walt’s only reaction was to slump in his seat and drain both of his bottles of beer.

“Jeff, better get him some more. Walt this is what Warrick wants to build in secret, out in the other colonies.”

As the plans went up on the big screen, Walt decided the cooler did not hold enough!

* * *
“It’s not an accident they named this thing a reactionless drive,” Link Ditmars said to Rob Williams as they looked at the tenth scale mock-up trucked from one of the Universities storage buildings and now in a warehouse just outside the spaceport. “The grav control may make it feel as smooth as silkweed It still gulps hydrogen for power, but not all that much of it to keep the field going. You can’t get something for nothing.”

“We’ll I’m no physicist,” Rob started out before Link cut him off.

“I know what you are going to say Rob, and believe me, you flatter yourself when you talk about not being a scientist. The few people in system who claim to understand this thing say it will work and I believe them. You just make sure the people that pack this into the meat locker we take back home home with us are the kind you can trust to keep their mouths shut.”

“Emmet Clark is handling it in Hank’s absence. We have no worries on that score.”

“We always have worries Rob, always.”

“And one of them is that we have all the dingbats demanding an observation station to see if Alpha is going to blow up. Course it’s going to blow up. . . in a couple of hundred million years. Harriet Fletcher has the Progressives riled up and in a snit. She is demanding we set up an observation station close to Alpha and find out once and for all that it’s safe to keep living here!

“As if we had a choice.”
That part of your plan has worked out fine Emmet. What do we do next?”

“We get Jamil M’butu to send the data back to Earth and ask them to look at it. You let Jamil know that it’s a waste of time and a strain on our resources.”

“Ok,” Williams said, “I do that. They’ll just agree that this is a bunch of nonsense and that yes, it’s gonna’ blow up, but we have a few hundred million years to figure out what we do next.”

“That’s good enough for you and me but what about Harriet and the Progressives?”

The light went on in Robs head, “Of course! They will still demand we take some kind of an action if only to try and make me look irresponsible if I don’t. I tell Jamil I have to cave in on this one. He understands enough about our political situation, he should, he’s responsible for a lot of it, and we send the mission and make it our cover.”

“Correct!” Link said. “And after we find a spot we make sure we send one or two of the right kind of scientists. Someone looking to make a name it only for the newsies and on the vidscreen. It’s a bonus that astronomy was one of the few sciences that wasn’t suppressed by the FG; they never saw any harm in it. Useful for finding transit points and system data but no way to threaten the FG power structure.”

Williams was in a much better mood when he returned to his office.

* * *
Hank Carling walked into the private dining room at Liza Morgan’s place expecting almost anything. What he was not expecting was a calm and smiling Andrew Webb.

“Have a seat Hank, I think my booze is better than Wild Turkey but I can’t match genuine Havana’s. I mean it, please have a seat and let me talk for a few minutes.”

“It’s your dime,” Hank said noncommittally while considering the ramifications of that last remark. He had suspected Davis or Webb had someone inside of Bhutros M’butu’s organization and here was Andy close to straight out admitting it, unless it was a slip. How else could anyone know about the gift liquor left back on Earth? It seemed Andy was under the impression Hank had brought it all back with him so at least the leak seemed to be in M’butu’s camp and not in the few at the embassy that knew anything about it.

“You know Andy,” Hank said before taking a small sip of his drink. I didn’t really like the stuff all that well, tastes too much like licorice. But I wonder how you found out about it. Was it the driver?”

“Not of the ground car, we never could figure a way to approach him that wasn’t too risky, but a driver, yes. The one that boxed it and drove the shipment from M’butu’s estate.”

Without further preamble, and still in the same calm tone Hank said, “If you and Davis keep this up you’re gonna’ get somebody killed. And it might even be one of your own. Yes, I will say, I’m thankful at times, and moderately surprised at the information you throw my way. And I also understand that commercial operations generate a lot traffic between the various systems. But let’s have another drink and I will tell you a little story.”

Hank looked over at the bar in the corner of the room and began to raise his hand. The room’s staff was exceptionally attentive to customer needs, and because of that knew from long experience never to interrupt Andy Webb when he was using one of their tables to hold a meeting.

Andy said when the waitress came to take the orders and Hank started to speak, “No Hank, I’ll get this one too, as you say, this is my dime.” They talked about family for the few moments it took for the refills and a basket of appetizers to arrive, and then Andy said, “Let’s hear the story Hank. Then we can move on to other things.”

“I was going to start on the long version but instead I’ll keep it short.”

“Take you time Hank I’m in no hurry and Rob Williams tells me you do spin a good yarn.”

“Alright then. You know the kind of budget constraints I work under. With your contacts the black part isn’t much of a secret. I have enough funding to maintain a full time staff of a dozen, and if I took all the rest of my discretionary cash for a decade I could just about pay for one of the parties Walt Davis throws when a top manager retires. We both know why that is, the there’s no end to what the government needs to spend on expansion and infrastructure right here on New Texas. And if my budget were higher we couldn’t hide it from Jamil. So I make do with what I have to work with, part-timers and patriots is the way I tend to look at them, and all more reliable than people in it for the money.”

“On Prescott, I work through the trade office. Naturally I get a look at all of the governments data before it is published, and by sifting it ever so fine learn quite a lot about the things we are interested in. I also have a part-timer working for the FG. A low-level clerk, a close relative of another contact on Earth. We helped her get the job and planned on making contact only if she dropped us something of interest. Didn’t expect much, but six months ago she did drop us a note. Someone was trying to recruit her–Or maybe not. The signals were very subtle and luckily she got in touch with us at once and all the timing worked out.”

“I got one of my people on the next flight to Prescott. We knew, or thought we knew, who was running FG intelligence on the planet but hadn’t a clue when it came to who or how many were working for him. I wasn’t going to risk the agent in place in any event. She had instructions to report any suspicious contacts to her FG supervisor just on the off chance something like this might happen. She wasn’t sure if this rose to that level. It looked to us like the FG was trying to turn one of their own for a trumped up spy charge and a ticket home. When my guy got there they came up with a plan.”

“The man had called and asked my part-timer for a date, something a low wage single mother was not about to turn down. They went to a nice restaurant, ate, and talked for a while, he tried to put the make on her but she said she had to get back to the children. He took her home and that was the last she heard from him. Of course my man was waiting when he dropped her off, got a photo, got the vehicle numbers and tried to follow.”

“He was good. My guy lost him and that seemed the end of it. The vehicle numbers were phony and no database we have had the guy’s picture in it. That’s how it goes sometimes. He must have sensed that the woman he was out with wasn’t going to work out and never made an offer, other than for casual sex. Nothing to report to a superior about and end of story.”

“Interesting Hank but I don’t see th…”

“Wait a minute Andy, I meant end of her story, not the end of mine. You see when my guy was on his way back here, home to New Texas; at the departure field, waiting to board the transfer ship, he saw someone that he swears looked remarkably like the man in the restaurant. Hair color and skin tone different, but my people are trained to look over those kind of things. Not a certainty it was the same man, but curiously enough, and what set off the alarms, was the person the guy was leaving the terminal with. It was Ric Saunders.”

“Now Saunders is smooth, Saunders is very very good. I wish he worked for me, or at least I had access to everything he has. Using Saunders as the search key we still couldn’t tie the two together but!. . . I’m not so sure FG intelligence, with all their resources might not have been able to do it if they had a reason to try. Maybe not, but it was a risky operation. That tells me things are speeding up on your end, or Saunders would have had the time to make sure that his guy had a flight out or at the least the two of them would never be seen together in public. He must have a lot on his plate and need every asset he’s got.”

“Someday he or I will slip up. And as I say, someone could get killed. Or worse the plan gets revealed, and then a lot of us go that route.”

Davis took his time replying, “That was quite a story, and yes, Ric told me he had some concern about the remote possibility that one of his people might be compromised. Something didn’t seem right to him. He said that from what he knew about, that woman should have jumped at the chance for a little more money and a chance to get something back from the FG. You are also correct about us stepping up operations. I told Ric that if he felt he could still use the guy to keep him around. Being too timid might cost us the game as easily as being too bold. We are going to be walking on a knife’s edge till we reach the point.”

“And hope we don’t cut ourselves.”

“That’s it Hank, but I do have some news that should make you breathe a little easier. I am pulling my people off of Earth. My reason for setting up that network no longer exists. The position of Deputy Chief of Sales for Webb Enterprises on Earth is yours to fill with whomever you wish. It’s not a position the carries Diplomatic Immunity but, it’s very public and has the cover from hell. This last person of mine off of Earth will deliver a total list of the contacts we have developed on Earth.

“As I am not going to need them anymore, here are the Account Numbers and Passwords for eight numbered accounts spread through Switzerland, the Caymans and Qatar. There is a minimum of five million credits in each of them.

“You need to link up with Ric Saunders on Truscott, he controls my network looking outward towards the Colonies. It’s time you two worked together.”

“OK, Andy two questions. What the hell did you need with a minimum forty million credits on Earth and what does Saunders have that I might want?”

“Hank, I told you that I was going to kill Redmond. That kind of operation don’t come cheap.

“Saunders only has the name of the man who has the complete math for the Reactionless Drive and the names of the FG Inspectors on the out Colonies that I own. I kinda thought you might wanta know that.”

“There is a lot to consider in what you’ve just said Andy, but we just might have the basis for a working agreement. And I assume with the job I get the budget as well?”

“That’s the general idea, we need to get Ric out of Civil Intelligence and full time on the military side. Also it does away with any duplication of effort. The forty six Million on Earth is to get you started, you need anything else talk to Mom. Welcome to the paid revolution. Having your guy in the sales department down in Detroit should help with any money transfers.

“I intend to win Hank, and that means putting the best people on the right job. So please tell me, who could I find to do a better job at Civilian Intelligence than you?”

“Off hand I’d say anyone who could do it better wouldn’t take the job but that’s just a poor joke. I am not going to say yes or no right now. I’ve got to talk to Rob about it and I we have an ethical problem to work out.”

“An ethical problem?”

“Yes. The first part seems pretty straightforward. From what you say here, you are turning over the network and cash without strings or preconditions. I need to be sure there will be no post-conditions either. And for myself I need to figure how I square this with my oath to the New Texas government. I work for Rob but I really work for New Texas, is this the same thing? And what if the government changes?”

“I absolutely agree with your goals here and even that now is the time to start. It would be much simpler to resign and work as a private individual like you do. But the advantages of operating from a governmental position bring are too great to give up. Like I say I’ll talk to Rob and my wife too and we can get this settled in a couple of days. In the perfect world I can look back on this discussion and laugh about it.”

“Keep up that ability to laugh Hank, or else you might become just as crazy as the rest of us sometimes seem. As to that ethical problem ask yourself one question and we can talk about it later. Whose Government are you working for? Don’t try to answer now, we can talk later.”

“Speaking about laughing and a sense of humor, let me tell you one more story before I have to leave. I write my own material so bear with me.”

A Rabbi, a Priest, an Islamic Cleric, and an atheist were walking the streets of Paris back on Earth. The atheist posed the question to his learned company, “Which of your prophets, Gods if you will, has had the most powerful influence on the course of human development, Moses, Jesus, or Mohammad?”

The Rabbi went first and said, “I can make a very strong case for Moses as he first presented the laws from which civilization and human progress followed.”

“No, that can not be correct my dear friend,” said the Priest. “Jesus died for all of our sins and made it possible for us to find a state of grace. And it is only by accepting his gift that true humanity may be found.”

Well, at that moment all three of them looked towards the Cleric, who unnoticed by the others in the intensity of the moment had pulled out a scimitar concealed in his robes, and with two lightning fast motions he beheaded both the Rabbi and the Priest. And then, while wiping the blood from his blade upon the Cleric’s cassock, turned to the atheist and said, “So whose God is the more powerful?”

The atheist, badly shaken, wasted no time in saying as loudly as he was able, “There is no God but Allah, and Mohammad is his prophet!”

His story over, Hank looked at Andy who said, “I think you should keep with the spy thing and forget about becoming a comedian Hank. That was terrible!”

“You might think so Andy. But back on Earth when I told it told it to M’butu and every third Muslim I ran across, well they found it hilarious and each and every one of them laughed till they cried.”

“That is why I intend to address that problem. Hank, as much as I trust you, you are our spy and subject to visiting Earth not, a Military Commander restricted to the Colonies. On that point you have no ‘Need to Know’, just rest assured that it shall be addressed.”

Andy waved toward the bar intending to end the session and the young waitress nervously returned bringing a couple drinks. “Sir? Miss Liza asks if you have time to speak with her before you leave. She, um … sent these drinks. Wondered if you’d try them.” The tumblers held a dark midnight blue liquid.

Andy roared with laughter. “Tell Miss Liza we’ll try this concoction only if there’s a third glass, and her sitting here drinking it too. If she thinks we’re gonna be guinea pigs… ” The waitress couldn’t return to the bar fast enough to deliver the message. First day on the job, assigned to the private dining room, then serving what looked like frozen slush to the VIP. Geeze! Take this job and shove it or wait and see what he tips?

A couple minutes later Liza sauntered over to the table, blue beverage in hand.
“Witches or bartender’s brew?” Andy asked jokingly.

“Well sir, I reckon the Lone Star needs a signature drink. I’m calling it ‘Lone-some Blue.’ Jes wet your whistle. You’ll be surprised, yet pleased.”

Another guffaw from Andy with Hank joining in. “It’s our original order!?”

“Yep. We aim to please. Once we know your favorite drink, we just crystallize it and add blue food color. Some folks applaud their ‘new’ drink, but I knew we couldn’t pull the wool over your eyes. Just pullin’ your leg. Stop by anytime, always glad to see you.”

She was totally surprised to see Hank and Andy stare at each other and say in unison, “And the other guy never knows what you are really drinking!”

Liza wondered if there were two more evil grins in the Universe. The young waitress was stunned by the two Fifty Credit bills on the table.

To Be Continued.

Page Author | Wes November 9th, 2008